Career & Success

Three lies society taught you that can actually ruin your life

Updated on February 24, 2021, Moctar
Three lies society taught you that can actually ruin your life

These are three common misconceptions that can ruin your life!

I offer you 3 misconceptions that I have lived with for a long time and which I have decided to abandon due to ineffectiveness. I could have realized much earlier that everything I was told was a lie. All I needed was a little sense of observation and trusting my experience rather than what I had been told. But the important thing in any fable is morality: and the raven swore (but it's never too late) that we would not take it again...

“Suffering and hard work are the ingredients of success.”

This idea is spread under this other version: you have to struggle, toil, spend freely, and produce great efforts to succeed. This is what I believed for a long time, but if I look back, I realize that this idea has mostly led me to discouragement, tension and exhaustion. Someone who is relaxed, confident in life, smiling, at ease with colleagues, likeable, enthusiastic, open-minded will be much more successful in achieving their goals than anyone else. Moreover, we are starting to talk about “interpersonal skills” in the company and not just “know-how.”

“Who you are” is often more important than what you do. Of course, taking action is useful, and I don't praise procrastination. But knowing how to maintain an inner balance is just as important, otherwise. On the other hand, the things I wanted most in life were often brought to me by the serendipity of coincidence more than by any effort on my part. Finally, it is often better to act less but better, and in an inspired way.

“Most people think and reflect hard.”

This is not true! I have noticed that the less people think about a topic, the more fiercely they stand up for their certainties. But to thinking is difficult and it takes time. And most of us don't have that time. This is why it is much easier to conform to the surrounding thinking or to turn to artists, psychologists, one's parents, the Pope, personal development books (that's for me!), leaders, or policies to tell us what to think about.

The truth is, on a lot of topics, I don't know which the right choice is. Here, on the subject of pensions: is it realistic not to want to extend the duration of contributions? Despite the raging debate (and that I'm on TV), I don't know if there really is another solution. But I also know that to say “I don't know” is already starting to think.

“Love is about giving more than receiving.”

Inherited from our religion, the more time goes by, the more I realize how wrong this idea is. People who are really caring and generous are above all attentive and generous to themselves in the first place. When you become tolerant of yourself, you become tolerant of others. When we learn to love ourselves, we find it easier to love others. Giving everything to others first drives you crazy: it leads to resentment and bitterness. It just doesn't work.

What about you, do you have any trendy misconceptions to add to this list?

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