Did you know why some women fear commitment after a previous relation failure?
Love & Family
If you feel good in a relationship, you don't have to be anxious. You have to take advantage of your love and deal with the difficulties as you go…Updated on October 18, 2020, Sarah
“Since my divorce, I was hesitant to start a new romantic relationship. Having just met someone, I decided to embark on this new experience but I wonder about him, my relationship, my family…”
It is normal to ask questions about this new relationship, to be afraid of another failure, afraid of harming your children, afraid of suffering... In addition, we must be careful not to reproduce situations that are already experienced.
Fear of not meeting someone
This anxiety is the first that you can feel when separated. You wonder about your ability to meet new people, to seduce… It is sometimes easier to be alone and to convince yourself that you do not need a companion, that your children and your work are enough for you.
Fear of falling back into the same kind of relationship
This fear often depends on how the separation went and why. It will be easier for you to rebuild yourself if you parted by mutual agreement, keeping good relations ... On the other hand, you will encounter more difficulties if you have suffered violence, lies, deceptions...
However, nothing prevents you from falling in love with the same type of man again and trying to build a solid relationship. What is important is to be careful not to fall into the patterns that led to your separation.
Fear of formalization
Faced with this new relationship, the question of formalization arises and the opportunity to make it. When will I introduce him to my family? How will the meeting go? How will my parents, my brothers, but especially my children react?
The latter put you under unconscious pressure because you are going to present them a future father-in-law, who can be a victim in spite of himself of his myth: a mean, severe, authoritarian man… The place and the role to be taken are therefore not obvious, especially since you cannot force children to love him. But that doesn't stop you from asking him to be respectful.
You should also be aware that the father of your children will keep a place in your life. He will be present, will have a role in the education of your children, in the organization of your weeks (coming to pick up the children every Friday for example)...
Remember, if you feel good in a relationship, you don't have to be anxious. You have to take advantage of your love and deal with the difficulties as you go… although sometimes help is needed most of the time, all of these situations are surmountable.