Forgiveness: It is not about forgetting or denying!
Life & Society
Forgiving is not giving up your rights either. If you are the victim of aggression or injustice, it is legitimate and important to file a complaint.Updated on October 12, 2020, Secka
We often have misconceptions about forgiveness. “Come on, it's good, it’s forgotten...” “I prefer not to talk about it...”
To forgive is not to forget. Moreover, it is almost impossible to forget an event that caused a lot of emotion in you: fear, anger, humiliation.
Nor is it to deny the injury or the attack to which we have been subjected. “It's okay, I don't blame you...” Sometimes we suffer so much to have been deceived or humiliated by a very close person, that we prefer to minimize things or to look for excuses. “She cheated on me, but for me it doesn't matter.” These attitudes look like forgiveness, but they are not forgiveness. Just masks, hide-and-seek, refusal to see the truth in the face, denial, etc. They cannot bring deep appeasement.
Forgiving is not giving up your rights either. If you are the victim of aggression or injustice, it is legitimate and important to file a complaint. Not to do this is to deny the harm that has been done to you, and it is to deny yourself a bit. Justice is a first step, necessary to get out of trouble and start to heal his wound. It has nothing to do with personal revenge. There is also no point in wanting to forgive someone who continues to attack you. Stop this situation or acts first: you cannot forgive your boss for his humiliating words if it happens every day. First try to escape his sarcasm: change department, job, and file an appeal, if you can go talk to him so that he stops his thoughts.